I went to the Lady In Red
I like this event from the past
Always seem to have a blast
But I should have stayed in Bed
It was at the Ala Moana Hotel
The Hawaii Prince was no longer
Everyone was dressed in red
Even Fred, Ned, and Ted
We went to dance our formation routine
We got naked in the bathroom to change
No change room did the organizers arrange?
My God, don’t you think that was strange?
My feet danced to avoid puddles of grime and pee
My body parts on display for everyone to see
The formation went well and there was food
But by then I was not in the mood
My clothes strewn out on the floor
My jacket held up by a broom
The announcer went on and on
He lauded every judge and performer, name after name
To me, they all sounded the same
But he still made some mistakes
For the Lady in Red contest, 20 odd ladies walked the floor
I wanted to leave – looking for the door
A pretty 20 year old competing against those over 44
Surprise surprise who got the top score
But the worst problem of the night
The thing that made me fight
Was there was no booze
Not even a glass of wine to choose
Boy did we lose
Sitting for 3 hours without a drink
I was left on the brink
I hope the organizer will correct his way
He got the message to his dismay
Cause if not….
The Lady in Red
For me will be the Lady is Dead
And I will stay in Bed.
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