Ex Knife Holder

Don't know what all the fuss is about the Ex Knife Holder. There is not one human who has entered my house who has anything nice to say about it or me for having one. The first time I saw this bizarre oddity, it was in Sydney, Australia at the home of a well know ballroom dancer and dance instructor. I instantly wanted one, not certain why, but probably because the knives were decent and the holder was a striking conversation piece. Very little thought went into this; it was indeed an immediate visceral attraction. 

Yes, when you look at it, there is a morbid penchant to visualize it a human with knives piercing through body parts....Mitch Rapp would be proud!  But this is a faceless human caricature, and the inclination or lack there of - to anthropomorphize this awkward plastic knife holder is really the issue at hand. Does it indeed conjure up the image of a human dart board with sharp knives shamelessly piercing through limbs and vital organs, or is just a plastic knife holder toy lacking other significance? Certainly the lack of facial features is comforting for it precludes any visual expression of agony that someone darted with so many knives might display. One wonders whether the location of the piercing knives has any significance or whether it was just a random determination trying to evenly place the knives maximally apart from each other.

The Ex knife holder I saw in Sydney was silver with stainless steel knives. The only one I could find to buy in Sydney was white, which after purchase, I packed away in my suitcase, hoping that customs and airport security would not question me about. Four years later, I could not resist the temptation to upgrade my Ex Knife Holder to the silver version, which I now call the Silver Slasher, shown here next to the retired White Knife. Despite the fact that White Knife still worked well and was more than adequate, it is nowhere to be found in my kitchen, replaced forever by the more visible and blinding Silver Slasher, knives clean and sharp, standing at attention ready to cut the next carrot, lettuce head, cucumber or tomato that crosses its path.