Writing to my dance teacher today at the tail end of an episode of a prolonged and incapacitating foot injury - one of many in the preceding six months - all dance induced recurrent foot injuries - both right and left - made it a true miracle that I competed injury free during my last two dance competitions.. December 2013 and March 2014........ But today, I am not focusing on the positive.
"I've been sitting at home doing a lot of work while getting fat and lazy. I feel like a hermit, I walk around hobbling like I remember my father did when he was a hundred, letting my beard bleed its natural color from neglect and overall feeling sorry for myself. The problem is made worse because I've reduced my alcohol intake substantially, mostly by substituting green tea (prostate healthy) for two+ glasses of evening wine. Only two nights in the last week have I weakened and then I didn't feel very good after. And it's time again for another cup of green tea! Problem is the caffeine keeps me alert and awake - not allowing the mood altering buzz of the alcohol to distort my self perception of the old man I really am pretending not to be."
To be sure, I am now in the 5th chapter of my life with the increasing realization of how fragile my health appears to be. I realize that I am luckier than most, but that is still little consolation. Injuries that took days to heal take weeks, ounces that were added to one's girth take months or years to shed, as compared to weeks. My eyes are failing, my body parts are sagging and my skin is withering and shriveling. And the looming cloud of reality from understanding ones physiology in relation to the effects of aging on organ function, coupled with the growing potential for cellular mutagenesis to express itself with increasing age, has creating an ever-present ominous uncertainty to my daily life.
And all of this has made me reconsider my recent decision to embrace the consumption of green tea. Maybe it wasn't such a good idea to cut down on the wine, after all.
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